I shared

in a meeting

the day

I counted five

(they were actually

six) days.

That morning

I reached for my toothbrush

from the side 

of the sink.

I saw myself

(it did not work).

Last winter

a tattoo friend

I don’t talk to

anymore

said, 

“it’s like it never 

happened,”

&

covered

the triangle

on

my wrist

with a daisy

(I was almost pushing it).

Before she

did that?

Reaching

for a drink

was hard to watch.

The next week?

I ate Taco Bell 

from the trashcan

(this actually happened).

The speaker in the meeting

yesterday

was

on

her bed 

in a towel.

She went

to the psych ward

twice in the three

minutes

I paid

attention.

I raised

my hand

(like a psycho).

To say I tripped on a step

( & fell twelve).

Nobody knows what I said

(a prayer?)

Shame steamed

up

the window

like cops

were knocking

when 

the secretary  

made an announcement

I thought I was in trouble.

“It’s spaghetti

on a grill

up there,” 

I told

both eve 

& 

eva

How it works.

You can’t

save your face

and your ass

at the same time

How but not why

(It took

twelve hours

 to explain three minutes)

It did work.

Still

Tomorrow I’m keeping my video off.

SPEAK OUT! SPEAK LOUD! Do you have something to say?

In the words of Madonna…”Express yourself!”

This is the space to share collective stories and opinions of our sobriety journeys. After removing drugs and alcohol, many addicts find their voices and discover new talents, abilities, and forms of self-expression. Sharing these stories and experiences helps those who share their story and those still battling addiction. So, let’s Speak Out! And Speak Loud! Because when we recover out loud, we help keep others from dying in silence.

How are you expressing yourself in recovery? Do you have something you’d like to share in this space? Videos, poems, art, essays, opinion pieces, music – bring it.  We want to hear from you! Please email us at [email protected] or DM us on social!

Disclaimer: All opinions expressed in the Speak Out! Speak Loud! Section are solely the opinions of the contributing author of each individual published article and do not reflect the views of The Sober Curator, their respective affiliates, or the companies with which The Sober Curator is affiliated.

The Speak Out! Speak Loud! posts are based upon information the contributing author considers reliable. Still, neither The Sober Curator nor its affiliates, nor the companies with which such participants are affiliated, warrant its completeness or accuracy, and it should not be relied upon as such.

If you or someone you know is experiencing difficulties surrounding alcoholism, addiction, or mental illness, please reach out and ask for help. People everywhere can and want to help; you just have to know where to look. And continue to look until you find what works for you. Click here for a list of regional and national resources.

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