Two and half years ago I quit drinking. I noticed my sleep got better, I had more energy, my anxiety went down, and all the other annoying things that non drinkers brag about to their friends that still drink. All of those things really did happen, but that’s not what this post is about. It’s about garbage.

I figured since I could quit drinking and had more time on my hands I could do other things I’m interested in like running, yoga, writing, reading, and binge watching TV. I also started walking my dogs more, and because I was also practicing being more present I began noticing all the garbage in the road, in people’s yards, and on the sidewalk. It was everywhere, and I wondered where it all came from and why I never noticed it before. Were people really just casually throwing their garbage out car windows and dropping empty bags of Fritos in the street?

Pack a bag

So I began bringing an extra plastic grocery bag on my walks. I use the plastic bags to line the bathroom trash cans, to pick up dog poop, and now to pick up garbage. Plastic bottles, cigarettes, a lonely soiled sock, various candy wrappers, fast food containers, flattened aluminum cans, receipts, lottery tickets, and even an empty bottle of Patron have all made their way into my bags. I started making up stories on my walks to justify why someone would so carelessly throw a piece of garbage on the ground.

I picked up a half full bottle of water near the tennis courts at the middle school one day. I decided it was okay because a young kid probably left it accidentally when his mom came to pick him up. I conjured up a 12 year old boy with floppy hair and long and lanky limbs. He was hot and sweaty, and was really irritated because his backhand sucked so he jumped in the car in a huff. After they took off he looked for his water, and realized he left it outside the courts by the gate. Right where I found it.

Then there was an empty pack of cigarettes, Marlboro Reds to be exact. I imagined a man in his early thirties with his tattooed arm hanging out of a car, some heavy metal music playing. He pulls his last cigarette out of the pack, lights it while driving with his knees, and he tosses the empty pack out the window. Not a second thought. But I’m thinking about it while I pick up his garbage.

Next there’s a tiny plastic bottle of Fireball. I envision another man and this time he’s in his forties and on his way home from work. He’s dreading walking into the door, facing the wife and kids. His wife is going to yell at him that the lawn needs to be mowed, and he uses his commute as down time. He pours the Fireball into a water bottle full of some kind of soda and tosses the bottle out the window of the car. He can’t leave the bottle for his wife to find. He doesn’t like to litter, but he has no other choice. So I picked it up for him.

On the same walk I come upon a cardboard container from McDonald’s full of grease stains on the sidewalk. It looks like its been there for a while, and this time I picture a woman with a car full of kids. She went through the drive thru and the kids are munching away on the Happy Meals and she got herself a Quarter Pounder with Cheese. She doesn’t allow herself to eat cheeseburgers very often, but she worked through lunch that day and is absolutely starving and it just sounded so good. So she ate the cheeseburger and immediately started hating herself and couldn’t stand to see the evidence so she chucked it out the window. Out of sight out of mind. I picked that up too.

I begin to think way too much about all of this garbage and I tell myself to get a grip, but I can’t get a grip because the world feels so chaotic and messy and hopeless and the garbage is another sign that people just don’t care anymore and everything is going to hell. The kids walking home from school don’t care about their community and they just drop their garbage onto the ground, and maybe the kid that left his water bottle from the tennis courts forgot it because he’s overscheduled and exhausted and still has to study for a math test. The guy coming home from work feels so unengaged and distant from his wife and kids because they are all on social media all the time that he buffers his entry with booze and tosses the evidence to the street. The poor woman who finally allowed herself to eat something is trying so hard to be the perfect employee, wife and mother that she forgets she’s allowed to be full and satisfied. The guy steering down the road with his knees so he can light his cigarette hasn’t cared about anything in so long that he forgot he was once a kid and loved to play in the rain.

We are all forgetting we used to love to play in the rain, and we are stealing everything from our children because we aren’t teaching them TO THROW THEIR GARBAGE IN A TRASH CAN or anything else for that matter. I go home and throw my bag into the garbage can at my house and lie down on my bed and stare at the ceiling. Did I tell my own kids to throw their garbage in trash cans? God I hope so. I’m going to have to call them to make sure. And then I start thinking of what else I didn’t tell them. I end up suffering that night, all night, and I align myself with all the crap in the world we are all dealing with.

After those agonizing hours of staring at the ceiling and pondering the impossible world we live in I decide I can get a grip. I can at least control myself, and I can pick up garbage. I let some negative thoughts disintegrate and I try not to stand in judgment for everything I do like breathing and tying my shoes, and then I think I should also stop judging other people and to let it go. I decide to make it a goal to pick up at least three pieces of garbage a day. If I can do that then I can anchor myself to the ground.

Picking up garbage gave me a jolt of awareness. All this newfound positivity led to me to begin noticing other things, ordinary things, that make me smile. Like the moon. If I’m lucky enough to see the moon before the sun comes up I love looking at it and I say thank you. I’m not sure why.

I was watching a show on TV about gorillas the other day and I felt the sting of tears. I felt so damn lost and sad and angry. I began thinking we are killing our planet, our blue planet that is so special and real and true and we are tossing it away like it’s garbage. The gorillas don’t even know we are doing this and they are at our mercy. They can become extinct, we can screw with their food source, we can displace them and they don’t even know how evil we humans are and all they can do is just try to survive while we destroy what really matters because of greed and superficial wants and needs. I don’t know what to do and it all seems so overwhelming. And then I feel guilty because I know I can do more but I don’t even know where to start. And then I remember I can care for my planet, I can show it some love. I can pick up garbage, and even when my day is intense, and busy, and I am sad, or angry or hurt I can walk out of my house and pick up some garbage. I feel more in control as I place the trash in my plastic bag and the walk and the fresh air all come together and I feel cozy and calm, knowing that I am making a tiny pin prick of a difference.

Commit to picking up 3 pieces of garbage a day

We can’t all sit on environmental boards, donate thousands of dollars, be scientists solving global warming, or influencers lending our voices. But we can do simple things that can give us a sense of giving back. No matter if we are young or old, rich or poor, living in beautiful sprawling neighborhoods, or high rise government apartments, we can all commit to one simple act of picking up 3 pieces of garbage a day. When so much is out of our control, we can control ourselves, and we can make a difference.

When evening comes it has become a part of my life to make sure that I’ve picked up at least 3 pieces of garbage. It may have been in the parking lot at work, it may have been when I was in an aisle of a grocery store, or it may have been in my neighborhood, but I make sure I’ve done it. Most days I pick up a lot more, but when I don’t I believe 3 is a magic number. Imagine what our world would be like if every person on Earth committed to picking up 3 pieces of garbage a day. Maybe those that feel lost and sad and powerless would start realizing their power and begin having a sense of purpose and control. The world would at least be a bit tidier, and maybe even the gorillas might stand a chance.

SPEAK OUT! SPEAK LOUD!

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The post Embracing Sobriety: How Getting Sober Unveils a World Full of Garbage and Inspires a Daily Commitment to Cleanup appeared first on The Sober Curator.